Your kid Is Angry?! This Is The Best Way To Deal With Him

parents need to understand that most kids show tantrums by the age of 1-4. All toddlers want to do certain things themselves, pour liquids into mugs, eat or dress without assistance, and can be very upset if they are prevented from doing what they want and this discomfort may lead to a tantrum and irritability. 

 Your kid is angry?! This is the best way to deal with him

At the age of 5-10, they want to do what they are doing, or when they want something, they show undue anger too or break their toys or something at home.

Do not panic, dear parents, we will explain some of the main things to deal with your child's anger in the next lines, so focus on to benefit.

 

How can I deal with children's anger: 

• Children like adults get angry, object, and scream, but their experience in recognizing their feelings and how to deal with them is weak, not yet formed or refined, and they may even know that what they feel is "anger", and they also know what is worth anger for, and what angers them in the first place. 

• Your child's screaming may make you feel confused in front of others. Or feel angry or embarrassed, but remember that learning children to deal with their emotions is part of normal development.

What is the responsibility of the family?

• This, of course, falls on the shoulders of the family, and sometimes they may make mistakes that increase the child's awareness of his feelings and how to deal with them, as most of what the child imbibes in his childhood remains stuck, in one way or another, with him until he grows up. 

• Understanding and adapting to feelings is the building block in establishing social intelligence, which will play an important role in the child's social life and his relationships with others, as genetics play a role in intelligence, but social intelligence is taught and is likely to be right and wrong. 

What mistakes do parents make in dealing with tantrums that are entirely new to the child and his experience, and how can the child be taught to understand and control these feelings?

How to distinguish intermittent tantrums from an angry child as a permanent feeling? 

Before deciding on the subject of discrimination, we must first ask several questions: 

How old is the baby? When did the situation happen? How and why did it happen? And what did he do during a tantrum? 

• These questions help us as parents to discern first of all whether it is a natural tantrum, or if this is what surfaces and foreshadows something greater than a tantrum that must be dealt with. 

• It is normal for a child to cry if he is hungry or wants to go to the bathroom, but it is not normal to find a seven-year-old accompanied by tantrums by smashing glass, for example, or uttering insults inherent in screaming. It is normal for a five-year-old child to get angry if his mother moves away from him, but it is not normal for him to cry, get angry, and miss his teacher in the middle of the night with repetition.

Some causes of tantrums:

• Parental deprivation, frequent unfulfilled promises, negative comparisons, and constant quarrels between parents make anger a guest inherent in the environment in which the child lives and become a regular "uncritical" in the eyes of the child. 

• With his assertion that deprivation may be one of the two parts of the equation, psychological and material, the child deals with the senses remarkably and will affect him to be emotionally saturated and deprived materially, or vice versa, it is necessary to balance and strengthen with reasonable equality between the two sides of this equation. 

• The negative comparison between siblings or relatives, will make hatred, anger, and repression things that exist continuously because the comparative party is constantly present in the child's environment, and this includes children under the age of ten years, the arrival of a new baby, a new child, a new brother, is something that fuels anger and will rob him of the attention that was poured over him without sharing, and we describe it as "competition that was not taken into account."

• Anger, irritability, indignation, suppression, and a host of other synonyms we can keep mentioning and writing, and another list of perceptions and descriptions we used to hear, such as "his blood boils" or "when he gets angry, he goes blind." 

• This is indeed similar to the feelings that children are exposed to that they do not know that they "boil their blood" or irritate them, and the function of parents here is to draw broad lines that define for the child the new features that he is forced to understand and deal with. 

• We always emphasize the importance of agreeing that coordination between the words mother and father, which is the most important step in this process, is seen as coordination, through which the child sees that the parents do not contradict in dealing with him, as deprivation is agreed upon by both, and giving as well. 

• The number one mistake is the contradiction, that the father is lenient in a situation and the mother vice versa, or the fluctuation in the decisions issued against the child, this is enough to make the child's environment with an unclear and gelatinous character, 

Based on this observation, we present a set of points that help the child to distinguish and understand his feelings:

• Explain why the child is prevented or given the agreed reinforcement.

• Talk to the child directly and in clear words and with a message that carries one idea for the child.

• If he speaks well, he prefers to ask him to repeat what he understood from his parents, as this makes it easier to understand his personality and deal with it.

• Not to retreat from the agreement with him, unless they agree with each other on this retraction, with the need to clarify the goal of retreat to the son.

• Strive not to back down from decisions because of the child's screaming or anger, otherwise, he will learn that whenever he wants something, the way is to scream.

• Reward the child whenever he commits, with an explanation of the reason for the reward or reinforcement.

•  In the event of any disagreement between the parents, it is necessary to clarify this to the child with the assurance that he has nothing to do with the matter and not to drag him to be an article in their dispute.

We must leave him angry? (Ignore Him)

The most popular tradition of advice says: If a child cries or gets angry, "leave him", is this useful advice? If the cause of anger is known and understood, the child can be left to express his anger, without ignoring it. 

• Once he has calmed down, he must discuss and understand that his behavior is wrong, provided that the parent's anger and delay are not caused by a biological need for the child, as this cannot in any case be the child's fault. 

• We must understand what bothers the child or strains him, and try to remove everything that could cause it if the child shows anger in front of people, 

• it is the duty of parents here to assure those around not to deal with the child during his tantrum, and that they - his family - are more efficient in dealing with him, and there is no objection to consulting a specialist to give them satisfactory scientific answers.

During a tantrum :

• Do not be frightened:  The important thing to do is to stay calm and not bother yourself. Just remind yourself that it is normal, and many parents deal with children's anger without emotion. 

• Try to fix their attention: You can do this if you are in a position and know that the child will inevitably get angry and react. This can be eliminated by fixing their attention and pointing your finger at the red sports cars on the road. Laugh at the funny pictures in the shop or give them their favorite toy to play with.

• Remember what to try to do: You are trying to teach your child important instructions and that you are also committed to them.

• Neglect the tantrum: You must calmly continue what you are doing, for example, talking to others or shopping, but always watch the child so that he is safe but not completely ignored, ignoring the child is a difficult process, but the opposite may give them the attention they want and thus repeat the anger every time.

Attention to good behaviors: 

• Many times, tantrums occur in calm situations appear on the child, for example, stop screaming praise them immediately, and now give all your attention to the child, talk to him in warmth and kindness, if you reward the new good behavior the child will remain calm and will learn in the future that calm is the only thing that brings the love of parents and their gifts.

 

How to avoid a child's anger: 

Anger always occurs in predictable situations and to make it easier for children to overcome these situations I do the following:

• Take his favorite books and toys in such cases.

• Store his favorite biscuits away from children's eyes and don't keep them on hand.

• Always adhere to instructions and principles.

• The child may be angry at certain times of the day when he is tired or hungry.

•  In these cases, the following arrangements may help them a lot:

• An afternoon sleep is better than staying awake all the time

• Afternoon snacks are better than waiting for dinner impatiently

 

When do you need to get help: 

• It is important to exchange dialogue with other parents or friends at first. 

• If they don't help you control your child's tantrums, you can seek help from a social worker or your doctor, who may give you helpful advice or refer the child to a specialist for help.

In the end: You must pay attention to the child's actions in general to find out, whether they are transient tantrums or possibly permanent problems in both cases, the cause must be known to control it and modify this behavior from negative behavior to positive behavior.

I hope that the article answered some of your questions and was useful to you if there are any questions, please share them with us in the comments on the site.

Wish you all a happy family and a bright future